Freedom from the Food Fight
“Breaking bread together, sharing food, sitting at table eye to eye is essential to individual growth and relationship. Adults and children are not just bodies to be fed, but also minds to be challenged, hearts that depend on emotional input to survive and to grow as healthy human beings, and spirits that long for connection with God and purpose in life. Feasting together is a powerful way to fulfill physical, emotional, and spiritual needs.”
Food Foundations
There is no piece to the puzzle of health so important - so critical - as food and nutrition. But friends, it is also no secret that despite what should be the simplest, most accessible shift we can make in our family’s journey to healing, food and nutrition can feel like the most difficult and impactful hurdle.
Maybe what makes the “food fight’ so difficult is that it is one we have to engage in every day, multiple times a day. Or, maybe, it's the fact that we have to work hard to unlearn many years of misunderstanding or false teaching around food. And even more still, maybe, it’s the fact that food - eating - is emotional. We have emotional ties to our food choices, our favorite foods, our indulgences, and our restrictions. And, most of all, I see that oftentimes our own perception of how we are “doing” as parents can be rooted in how we choose to engage in the persistent effort of nourishment for our kids.
But, like no other lifestyle change we’ve discussed so far - food is not only a foundational piece of whole-body health, it may be one of the most critical. And, it is an area that is very severely under attack. Let’s think this through: our kids are bombarded by junk food every day of their lives. In fact, the most heavily processed foods are often marketed as “for kids.” Never in our history have we been this removed from the origin of our food, and never before in our history have we been this removed from the creation of meals. But if we want healing - true, life-long healing - we have to do the work today to unlearn decades of “faster, cheaper, bigger” as better for our plates and bodies. Instead, we have to build habits our children can return to all their lives that sees that nutrition is in the slow growth from the earth, the investment in quality meats and proteins, and the balance and portions that make us feel healthy.
Let’s reject the idea that food exists simply to be consumed. Instead, let’s relish in the idea that food, feasting, was created to sustain and nourish. To be savored and enjoyed. To be a source of connection and growth around a table with those we love.
“Even the simplest supper, meal, snack, or teatime can become, in some way, a feast—a lavish celebration of the living God's life and goodness. It's not just about the physical act of eating, but about sharing and enjoying life as God designed and gave it to us. That is the essence of the lifegiving table.”
- Clay Clarkson, The Lifegiving Table: Nurturing Faith through Feasting, One Meal at a Time
Reinventing the Meal
For most of us, nutritional eating is going to look very different from the food we ate as we grew up. I know that it did for me. When I first began changing my family’s diet, it was a fight. There was comfort in what we knew, and so many foods we loved were tied to traditions and celebrations. But, I knew that the traditions we were honoring, weren’t honoring us in return. We were sick and getting sicker, and something had to change on the table. So I started simply. In those places we still needed food traditions, I made new ones. And on those occasions where foods were needed, I swapped out inflammatory ingredients for better options. It wasn’t overnight, it was a slow, steady walk. But I was consistent. And I had my eye on the long game. Momma, I can’t encourage you enough that you are capable of this change. Stay strong, and don’t be afraid of change. Your family will often “feed” off of you! And when you know that your health, their health, is on the line, it is so much easier to keep your eye on the healthy goals you have for your family today and in the future.
On Picky Eaters
I do know, first hand, that just because it is simple to say - it isn’t always easy to make these switches, especially when picky kids are involved. I have walked this road, too, and I am telling you there is hope. You are NOT alone. But, you are the parent. Stay firm, stay consistent. And more than anything: do not give up. It is said that a child may need to try a food up to 16 times before they like it. How many of us give up after one or two tries? Their little taste buds are maturing and changing, so do not write off any foods too soon! Keep an open mind, and encourage them to do the same. And just like with those things we let fill our minds and hearts, it is important to remember here that we are, again, the gatekeepers of our home. Inflammatory foods find their ways to our bodies through our wallets. Our strength, resolve, and consistency to their health is critical from the grocery store to the table. If we don’t buy it, it can’t be consumed!
But, of course, there are outliers in every situation and I do want to caution you here: be aware of any picky tendencies with your children. A food journal can be very helpful in identifying patterns in the foods they are rejecting. If you see a consistent texture, flavor, or ingredient, make a note of that and let’s talk that out. In many cases this consistency can be an indicator of nutrient deficiency or sensory processing needs. But, together, we can work to conquer that mountain as well!
A Family Feast
So whether it be the end of day exhausting fight with picky eaters at the table or the monotony of meal planning and prepping, how do we overcome our food hurdles and become families that feast together?
Well first, we become families that cook together. Open the kitchen, momma. Now I know this is a big ask. I do. Its messy, its slower, and sometimes it can be pretty stressful. But teaching ourselves and our children how to create a meal from fresh ingredients is a skill that will serve them all the days of their lives. It will get them in touch with those foods that make their bodies feel strong and healthy, and maybe even reveal those that make them feel tired and sluggish. They will begin to gain an appreciation for the time and effort good food requires, and by extension, an appreciation for the hands and heart that work day in and day out to prepare it.
Next, grow together! I’m not saying we need to all go out and buy a farm with acres filled with gardens and chickens (but wouldn’t that be amazing!?). No, each of us has the ability to grow our food in the area given to us. If that is an apartment patio container garden, raised beds in a suburban backyard, or a windowsill herb garden, growing food is accessible to all of us. And there is so much value in our children digging into the seed-to-table process. Again, we grow an appreciation for creation and the time it takes to make the foods we love, but also, it empowers us to grow what we love and not be limited to the grocery store shelves! Let them experiment, let them get dirty, and when they find success (and sometimes a little bit of let down) with the garden process - celebrate that moment. They are learning what it is to nourish themselves now and for life.
And lastly, plan together. You’ve heard me say it before - a goal without a plan is just a wish. And the same is true with healthy meals. You must plan and prepare for those nights that are inevitably a bit busier. And, also, plan for those occasions that call for celebration foods. Bringing your family in on the process will help them to feel empowered over their food choices and a part of the whole family’s journey. Get them thinking of foods in terms of the “rainbow” and challenge them to fill the meal with as many colors of the rainbow as they can. If they are finding new foods they enjoy, encourage them to find other ways to incorporate similar ingredients, seasons, or plant some to enjoy again and again.
And finally, feast together! Enjoy the fruits of your labor! While the transition to wholesome foods can be difficult at first, I promise you, it does not have to be bland and boring. If a recipe doesn’t suit your family, no big deal! Keep searching! There is no end to the variations on recipes and seasoning you can use to make a meal a feast for your entire family to enjoy. I hope you can find those meals, and make the occasion special. Slow down for your dinner together, and use those moments as a point of connection. Build your new traditions, and when you launch your kids into the world, they will return to them again and again.
There is so much to be covered when it comes to all things food and nutrition, and I want to encourage you to check out a Mighty Warrior Kids membership if this is an area you are needing support. In our membership community, we not only address the importance of nutrition, but we have a breakdown of the most common diets, diet-specific ebooks, printable food journals,and free meal plans. There is also a place to submit questions for our community zoom calls, and discounts for one-on-one consultation.
You can do this, momma. Do not fear food! It is here to nourish you.
Tell me: what’s your biggest hurdle when it comes to feeding your family? Let’s reinvent the meal together!
Now go and feast!
And want to know more? I’d love to stay in touch!
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